Realism in Games

What are games for? You play them for escapism, you play them to briefly disconnect with the (cruel) reality, and you play them to forget that about that nagging girlfriend, to pretend that the crimson red bill does not exist, to rule and kick ass in a fake realm because you’re a maggot in the real world. Alright, forget all the lame reasons for playing a game. The bottom-line is, we play games because they are fun.

Since when does FUN == REALISM?!

A couple of years ago, Undying, a horror-First person shooter was released. It was a rare gem at that time that really gives you the creeps, sending shivers down your spine as spirits whispers gently to your ears. The retarded final boss apart(plus some minor hitches), it was a very enjoyable game. However, I remember seeing a game critic bashing the game for being “not realistic”. His claims? Medikits and bullets are scattered everywhere at obvious places (as opposed to being hidden in reasonable places).I also remember that particular critic whining about gameplay being too linear because doors are locked and unlocked automatically throughout the game to prevent you from getting lost.

And now, people are complaining about the monsters in Doom 3 lacking er, Artificial Intelligence. ARGHHH THAT’S THE FINAL STRAW!!

I miss the days where it is completely OK for level designers to put oil barrels lining up like dominoes. And if you blow one up, the domino effect will render nearby monsters to meat piles. Nothing beats the feeling of seeing meat, blood and explosions jumbling up, knowing that your cold, heartless shotgun is the cause of it. Anybody questioning the logic of arranging oil barrels in that manner? Nope. Anybody whining about it being UNREALISTIC? Nope. (Doom)

I miss the days where it is completely OK to have secret areas everywhere, ah, the joy of shooting a Nazi banner on purpose only to accidentally unveil a new secret area! In these secret rooms crowns, jewels, scepters, gold, and many other treasures await. “But its not possible for someone to carry that much treasure while running around kicking Nazi-arse!” “The treasure does not affect the game play in any way!” Didn’t even think about it. WHO CARES?! Its fun to collect a shitload of treasure, and even more fun to have them lining up for you one by one while you run over them, triggering the intensely gratifying sounds of errr…. treasure collecting sound effects. (Wolfenstein 3D)

Now for one of my favorites: back then it was completely OK to have a super big room, with close to hundreds of imps, cacodemons, machine gun dudes, shotgun dudes, lowly hand gun dudes and demons. Oh yeah I forgot to mention ALL of their backs are facing me, apparently they are just dancing at the same spot. No time to think, as you throw your puny hand gun away to reveal the earth-shattering, butt-kicking, badass BFG9000 and press fire… seconds later, nothing is standing, nothing is dancing anymore, every monster were truly and humbly 0wned by the BFG9000. Why the huge crowd of hell’s minions? Why all of their backs are facing you? Were they having a monsters’ convention? Shut up! Because NOBODY questions the BFG9000.(Doom)

So you want a realistic shooter? Heres one for you suckers for realism, custom designed by me:

1. No save game, because its not realistic to die and live again. If you die, the game will automatically uninstall itself, the DVD has an self-destruction feature too.

2. No locked doors, every door can be opened. In fact, every locked door can be forced open. You telling me you have a shotgun and you can’t open a door? No way man! No worries, a map will be given, find your own way through all the locked doors and unlocked doors, oh yeah, remember to try the windows too! Just to be sure, you better check out cracked walls.

3. Game play of half an hour. Nope, you did not read wrongly. In reality, you are not supposed to survive for so long! You shouldn’t even make it pass 10 minutes. What, one lone ranger against twenty terrorists that has the A.I. of super SEAL team tactics, capable of analyzing risks and covering for each other, not mentioning the sublime skill of rolling on ground, throwing back grenades and hiding like pussies when it is not safe to come out. You telling me its possible for you to come out on top against these guys? You’re shitting me!

4. Medikits will only at most heal 5% of your life. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that it is sparse too, count yourself lucky if you even see one. Bullets? Nobody in the right mind would scatter bullets around. Pick them ONLY off dead bodies. Bullets do not fit your gun? Hard luck, because that’s reality.

Have fun!

Someone else in the world wasn't amused with realism in games